Taking It to Work:
I have been on some good teams, and on some pretty poor teams. I have actually lead some pretty poor teams, especially in my early days. Looking back, many of the mistakes I made leading people were the same ones that can easily occur in raising and guiding children.
In fact, in many ways, leading in the world often follows similar principles as good parenting. Early in my career I was all about tasks, and did very little encouraging and celebrating. I just went right to the next task. I found out later, encouraging my children and those who worked with and for me, and telling them when they were performing well, was one of the best things I did for effectively leading those placed in my influence.
There was a flip side though, that was also a mistake – not correcting bad behavior soon enough. At work and at home, knowing how to correct and change destructive behavior is also vitally important, but unfortunately, it’s not near as comfortable or natural to administer, at least not for me. If it weren’t for Dr. Dobson’s book, “The Strong Willed Child,” and Patrick Lencioni’s, “The Five Dysfunctions of a Team,” I don’t think my kids would have turned out so good, and I don’t believe my leadership in the workplace would have been all it needed to be.
The tasks are important, but if you are in a place of influence, and it is your job to grow the people around you (Biblically that is always true), pay attention to the wins, but also don’t shy away from the more uncomfortable duties. Just like the father who avoids discipline at home will raise a dysfunctional family, for the leader in the workplace, it will be a dysfunctional team, or at best, an inefficient one.
Find the balance by consulting the Holy Spirit in prayer, grabbing some good books to counsel you in the right Godly approach, and then follow His leading to love and lead fully those entrusted to you, in the office and in the living room, as His Word works through you, today.
Hebrews 12:5-6 – “And have you forgotten the exhortation that addresses you as sons? ‘My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor be weary when reproved by him. For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives.'”
Hebrews 12:11 – For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.
Proverbs 13:24 – “Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.”1
Thessalonians 5:11 – “Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.”
Listening to the Holy Spirit (Rhema):
The love of the Father draws to right ways. As children stray, My hand moves to redirect, but also to reprove and chasten, for without such from a father, there is no fruit of their love. Pain is felt by both, but greatness from the child is drawn by the father’s sure hand. Grace abounds, but is limited by love, for misplaced grace drowns those who swim in its permissiveness. Love requires bounds of freedoms, that love would flow unbounded. The father who restrains not his children, allows habits of folly to bind instead. Discipline is of a loving hand – slow to anger, sufficient in grace, and teaching always what is right and good. An elder is called to such as well. Let he who is older spread wisdom, and guide also in love’s admonition. Let him be found encouraging the good, but also gently uprooting the vines that entangle the Godly. Do not lay low; even he who has fault can teach, and in doing so, he shall also grow with he who he chastens.
